“The Hardest Job Kids Face Today is Learning Good Manners Without Seeing Any.”

Fred Astaire, musical comedian, said the above. Although some may see etiquette as an antiquated notion in our modern times, it has also been said that “A man's manners are a mirror in which he shows his portrait,” (German Johann Wolfgang von Goethe). Whichever way you look at it, manners and etiquette are very important things in the repertoire of the business leader.

Take, for instance, something we do on a daily basis: Eating. There are a few rules of etiquette to follow. Mind you, these are just a handful:

1. Do not sit too far back in a reclined manner or put your elbows on the table, or otherwise lounge.

2. If possible, never cough or sneeze at the table; don’t make any noises while eating. Do not talk while your mouth is full.

3. Be cheerful in conduct and conversation.

4. Do not play with table utensils.

5. Never leave the table before the rest of the family or guests, without asking the host or hostess to excuse you.

A bonus one, for this has always been a favorite of mine:

· Wishing to be served with more tea or coffee, place your spoon in your saucer.

In addition, those rules of etiquette aimed at girls in the Victorian Era that each of us might find a place for in our everyday lives:

1. Rise to one's feet as respect for an older person or dignitary. This also applies to a gentleman, for a lady.

2. Speaking of gentlemen: A true gentleman tips their hat to greet a lady, opens doors, and always walks on the outside.

3. An interesting one: A young lady should be expected to shine in the art of conversation. Etiquette books of the era concentrate on the voice, rather than the content of speech, encouraging her to cultivate that distinct but subdued tone. In the current era, content is just as remarkable as tone and inflection.

While manners are largely an unenforced construct of standards in social behavior in which the person possessing them are portrayed to be polite and cultured, the art of the manner has degraded throughout the years. Although unenforced, they fall within the same scope as laws in that good manners may go rewarded and poor manners may be punished. Saying “please,” “thank you,” “pardon me” (or “excuse me”) are the most basic manners that we should follow.

Manners and etiquette exist such to show respect for those around you, and to show respect for yourself.

“Manners are very important in life. Good ones that is. You can get attention if you use proper etiquette. Politeness is what most guests look for. If your parents raise you correctly, you will probably have fair manners.”
—Judith Martin, a.k.a. “Miss Manners