Friday, September 02, 2005

Hints, Allegations, and Things Left Unsaid

Anyone who has ever worked in the nursing profession will tell you that a good charge nurse staffs extra during a full moon. Any police officer, convenience store clerk, or even a fry cook at the local fast food joint will tell you that there is something different about the general public during a full moon.

Eariler this week a colleague of mine (Rick, the Wonderful Richard of PAR) mentioned that there was a new moon later this week. Today, tomorrow, I haven't kept track exactly. He proposed that the new moon would have similar, if not the same, effects as the full moon. I didn't necessarily believe him to the extent that I do at the end of my work shift tonight.

For those of you who have read earlier entries, you know what I do. I take escalated and advice calls from receivables management agents. The last time I heard, on average, about 25% is the average for escalated calls...and up to today, this week was pretty alright with escalated calls. People were civil, if not pleased with the resolutions I offered in most circumstances if I weren't able to de-escalate the situation first through the representative.

This was not the case today.

Today was the typical reason why my industry has a high turnover rate. I was called viscious, the "white man in control," and that what I had to offer was...well, we won't go there just yet. Some people are passive--they hint about you through thinly-disguised sarcasm and comments (is that how you treat your customers?). Other people are quick to allege that you are doing something illegal, taking away their right to do something, or what you do is, well, B.S.

People, when faced with most situations, like I have mentioned earlier, present the typical "fight or flight" reflex. If they don't get what they want, while asking in a civil or--God forbid--a nice manner, they will become mean about it.

Customer:
"I made a payment arrangement for today, but I need another week: [insert rationale here]."

Me:
"I'm sorry, but I cannot offer you such an arrangement due to your previous payment history being poor, your credit class, and the fact that you are asking for an extension of an extension and this is something that we simply do not do."

Customer:
"[Insert more reasoning here]"

Me:
"I'm sorry, unfortunately I'm not able to offer an extension at this time. Is here anything else I can address with you today?"

Customer then goes into a string of profanities and often will pull what they feel are "dealbreaker" cards: I will cancel my service, I will go with another company when my contract expires, and (in extreme circumstances) I will just just stop paying you guys altogether.

Let me tell you: We hate it when customers call us "you guys." We typically laugh at such "customer speak" or "customer logic" to keep up our sanity.

Enough work for now. I have had something burning in my head for the better part of the day.

How does one reconcile the past with the present? There was a time in my life where certain things brought certain joys to my life. For the first time in a long time, right now, I am stable. I am fair to happy. I have a good job where I am liked and even respected. I am professionally competent and technically proficient in my occupation.

However, upon learning some news about someone from my past today, I seemed to have lost something.

I have always cared for this person very much. Ever since the Wednesday evening that I met them. Over the course of some time we became close, but as I was young and stupid...I made mistakes and this person left my life. I tried to bring this person back into a closer role in my life with no avail. They moved on with their life in multiple ways. Today I realized that this person would forever be gone from any more of a role in my life than they are now. It left me feeling somewhat empty.

Fast forward to today. Why do I feel the way that I do? I search for some sort of closure on this, but my prayers go unanswered.

So, for all of these years when I feel that I have wanted to tell this certain person the thoughts that lie deep inside of me in places that I don't speak about at dinner parties, I haven't said anything. Over the years I have tempered out of me the habit of being passive with situations--letting things go without saying or doing something. This person tried desperately to make me into a different person. I attribute much of the betterments that I have self-initiated on myself up to today to what I figured was the intent that this person wanted as traits in another person. Maybe I haven't got them right on all accounts, but I saw a mold that would be better for me in the long-run, and I ran with it.

Hints and allegations may or may not get you somewhere in life...but I know for certain that the things that go left unsaid will certainly be able to undo those things that you care so much for.

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